Friday, August 19, 2022
Islamabad (Urdu Point. DW Urdu. August 19, 2022) I have often heard the phrase that women are respected more in our country and not in foreign countries. Chief among the arguments for this opinion is that we give women a place in the queue, a seat, open the door, etc. There is no doubt that it really happens, there is some cultural background and some religious education, but why are we so low in the gender gap index in spite of so much respect? Pakistan's 145/146 number in terms of education, health, professional opportunities, is this an international conspiracy?
According to a new report released by the World Economic Forum, Pakistan and Afghanistan are at the bottom of the 2022 global index of gender equality across the world.
How can our country lag behind other countries in terms of social and economic opportunities available to women?
If we talk about the status of women socially, even today we hear more than congratulation on the birth of a daughter, 'No matter what' and especially the mother is immediately declared poor. It is not known whether it is interesting or lamentable that women are the bearers of this outdated tradition of the patriarchal society, who are still reluctant to see their sons, grandsons and great-grandsons.
It is very sad when today's educated girls also seem to want a son. After discussing feminism in many Facebook groups, she will also say that everyone should pray that Allah blesses them with female children and that they may be strong in their place. What is this reverence and respect that is causing a loss of respect and a weakening of status from the newborn to its mother? Thankfully, this practice is decreasing now, but still the majority thinks like this and there is a dire need to improve this trend.
Divorce or remarriage in the absence of sons is still widely accepted in many families. Women themselves have to take the initiative to end this outdated tradition. If we want to respect our gender in the true sense, we must first learn to respect and be proud of this gender.
It is also very acceptable to denigrate women or ridicule every movement related to their rights, from humor to serious discourse.
This sexism is so deeply ingrained that it seems strange to talk about it. This change cannot happen in a day, but realizing it at every level can be a positive step. Honor and respect is the basic right of every human being, disrespecting anyone, male or female, in the name of humor is simply bad manners. Social media is playing an important role for positive development.
The trend of formal training in offices is gaining momentum, but individual effort is equally important.
When it comes to traveling on public transport, it's a fact that in most foreign countries no one will actually offer you their seat just because you're a woman. My personal experience is the same because I mostly travel by tram and bus in Germany, but why this lack of respect never felt? Perhaps because even if you have to travel standing among people, everyone seems to be busy with their own work, no one stares at the women from head to toe and no one seems to make any noise.
Unfortunately, in our own country, the opposite scenario is seen. If the immediate reaction of your mind after reading this sentence is 'not even now', then surely you either belong to the class that never uses a bus or a wagon or to the class that has never used a bus or wagon. I have not seen this problem. Majority of the women in our country face harassment in one way or the other.
This is most common in public transport and public places. It is by no means that 100% of men do this, but unfortunately almost 100% of women suffer from it and it has nothing to do with clothing or age, it has only to do with the mindset of the perpetrator. If any man thinks that this has never happened to the women in his house, chances are you just haven't been told because your reaction could be anything.
If you don't worry about whether you're safe or not when you get on a bus, you don't worry about the eyes around you, you don't worry about who's sitting on your right or left, and especially on the back seat. So of course you will be immune to a woman's problem. It is a fact that some good-hearted men offer their seats to any woman standing, which is really a commendable gesture, while the purpose of this offer is to show respect, there is also a sense that the eyes around How annoying can it be?
Offering your seat is a good and quick solution but not a permanent solution to the real problem. Similarly, letting women go ahead in a long line at a bank or shopping mall may be respectful, but the most important thing is to protect the entire environment. So you don't feel disrespected in foreign countries, when someone doesn't behave like that, but doesn't make you feel unsafe and harassed either.
The purpose here is not to humiliate our own people by praising the British, the purpose is to realize the fact that we should not limit the scale of respect only to leaving a seat or giving a seat ahead in the queue, but a change in attitudes is necessary because true respect There are other criteria. This example is like if there are constant thefts in a neighborhood and everyone keeps changing the locks and not trying to catch the thief.
This awareness can only come through education and training and it is a long journey, the positive change that is being seen is also limited to certain classes. Everyone has to play their part. If good and honorable men do not cause any trouble themselves, then do not allow anyone else to do so in front of you. Police and other agencies should immediately take action on every complaint.
Even in developed countries, there are such accidents, but they are very few because everyone knows that there will be no relief if there is a complaint.
These sons, whose birth many mothers do not consider less than a desire for themselves, may God teach them that respect is the right of every human being, not only their mother or sister. Allow sons to express emotions so that they can understand the pain and suffering of others like a normal and whole human being.
Don't let this self-imposed definition of masculinity be passed down to the next generation. Also teach your daughter to learn to speak up for her rights. It is more important to bravely stand up for your rights than jump the queue using the 'I'm a ladies' card. Training is the duty of both mother and father, but if a woman mother has faced harassment herself, then make sure that no one's children are the cause of such torture. After all, how long will we continue to close our eyes like pigeons calling every issue a conspiracy and western propaganda?
Note: Opinions expressed in any DW Urdu blog, comment or column are the personal opinions of the author, with which DW does not necessarily agree.